Dawn of the Blue Laser

By James Pynn

I'm a simple man -- simple pleasures, some would even say I may be simple-minded. Humbug. I recently went to my local video store. I guess I should say my local "DVD" store, but old habits die hard. The double-time march of technology moves so quickly it's hard keep pace. In fact, I only recently have finished converting all my music tapes with CDs. And it only took me 10 years to do it.

Imagine my dread when the iPod entered the picture. I knew the writing was on the wall with regards to my CD collection. The problem is, which one do I use? The Touch? The Nano? The Mosquito? I think a waiting strategy is in order. By the time I have the cash to buy one, the newest one will be on the market. But I digress.

As I was scanning the new releases, looking for something to watch for the weekend, I couldn't help but notice the 60-inch HDTV playing a Disney cartoon. It was hard to turn my head away from it as it dealt with talking animals. I was so mesmerized I forgot why I was there. I forgot my name, the time, even where I lived. The Technicolor brilliance of the images moving on the screen had me thoroughly enthralled. Then, faintly -- in the distance -- I heard honking.

I'm not sure how much time passed, when my wife swept in and shook me by the shoulders. "What's wrong with you?" she asked. "You've been standing there for ten minutes -- didn't you hear me honking?" I brushed her aside and noticed the Blu-Ray player bolted underneath the screen. It was a revelation. I started blinking again and cleared my vision to see the shelves directly in front of me were filled with Blu-Ray discs.

I spent the rest of the night cleaning out my VHS collection and unhooking my video cassette player. I had rented a stack of brilliant new DVDs and was eager to get my new Blu-Ray player up and running. Covered in eager sweat, I finally settled down to watch my first rental around 10 o'clock. But something struck me -- where did my wife go? - 29968

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